Just when I thought that things might be getting better they get worse.... The guy who used to be there for me through everything wants to quite choir. No he's not gay... far from it and he makes choir interesting. I mean he's not the only one but... well it's hard to explain.
On top of it i made a mistake last year. School had just gotten out for the summer and i was at the river with my class and all my friends. There was just a few of us left cause everyone else went home and i was the only girl left. I knew i should have said no but didn't. I just wanted them to like me... i hoped it would be enough for them to even just consider that i have feelings and i matter too. They dared me to flash them... at first i said no and then for some stupid reason i listened. I walked i little ways away and flashed them. See know i should have known that it was going to come back and make me feel bad but i didn't do what my heart or gut told me to do. Ever since then i have never forgiven myself for it. Now my sister calls me a whore and so do her friends.. Even Brendan who i thought was my friend called me a whore, he said he was kidding but i don't think he realizes how much words hurt and when everyone who was there when it happened joins in all it does is make me feel worse then i already do.
People say the only reason no guys like me is because I am a whore... Is it true because i'm beginning to think there right?
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