Becoming Normal?

Friday and everyone is peppy and ready for the football game. Cheerleaders (including me) are in their cheer uniform and the football team are in their jersey's.
 It seems like everyone is excited for the game, even though are team isn't as good as it was last year, except for me. Why? Well if you have been having the week I've had you would feel this way too! Getting nasty notes/emails telling you "you don't belong here and you should "off" yourself," isn't exactly something that makes you feel good. So you can't really blame me for not wanting to be at school especially on a game day. But as i went to my locker during 2nd period there was a letter in my locker explaining to my how much i mean to everyone here and that they love me...
(Honestly i have to say that i was hopping it was from my friend Lander, but remembered that after last year he would never want to date me in a million years... so there went that tiny sparkle of hope.)
But it wasn't signed by anyone... at the end all it said is
                                                            i love you. <3
so it was a mystery to me. So as the day went on i actually was looking forward to come back on Monday.
                                        (So fingers crossed that it stays good!!!!)
                                                                    signed...
                                                                     A Girl!

A Girl: Who is she?

A Girl: Who is she?: My name is Kayla... and honestly i have no idea who i am! All i do know is that for some reason i hurt the people who have been there for m...

Who is she?

My name is Kayla... and honestly i have no idea who i am!
All i do know is that for some reason i hurt the people who have been there for me through my hardest times. They used to get along with each other and now there separating and it's all because of me.
I'm starting to think that if i wouldn't have came here they would still be friends. Everytime i come to this conclusion they tell me otherwise but i have a feeling that their trying not to hurt my feelings... but honestly if all i can do is hurt the people i love then i don't want to be "here". i want them to be happy and they never seem happy anymore.
I hope that blogging out my problems will help me with what i want to do but haven't gotten enough courage too!